Recently we had a discussion on my Facebook page about whether or not it was difficult to find good, positive, supportive people in your life.
Frankly, I don’t believe it is hard if you are willing to stand up for what you believe in, live in a way that is congruent with your beliefs, and put some effort into looking.
Who you associate with makes all the difference in your life. I once heard the incredible speaker, Dr. Nido Qubein, describe the impact of your social network using the example of the Koi fish. “The Koi fish grows in proportion to its environment. If you keep it in a pail of water, it grows only 2 inches. But if you let loose in the wild it can grow up to 2 feet,” Dr. Qubein explained. So are you like the Koi fish that has been kept in a pail? Is your environment and social network stifling your growth?
If you believe this to be so, then Dr. Qubein has a suggestion for you, “Make a list of the 10 people you spend the most time with and your top 5 goals and top 5 values. Compare the lists. Are the people you spend the most time with congruent with your values and goals? If not, you might be held back by this association.”
You need to spend more time with positive people and in a positive environment. In the weight loss world, study after study have shown that when you spend time with others who have the same goals as you, and who are making progress towards these goals, that you too will have greater success.
To help you attract the right people and positive support into your social network, here is the EarlytoRise.com Ultimate Guide to Finding Good People in Your Life
Step 1) Identify what you value in people.
Step 2) Identify where this type of person spends time.
Step 3) Go there.
Whether it is a church, gym, beach, dance lessons, bootcamp fitness class, Chamber of Commerce meeting, local lectures, weekend seminars, weekly group meetings, or a positive Internet forum, you don’t meet good people by watching TV…but good people ARE out there. Go forth and find them.
Let this quote give you some inspiration:
“When you take action, particularly bold action, the boundaries of what you believe to be possible (your belief system) expand. Which, in turn, gives you the capacity to consider new ideas, new possibilities, and new concepts that you previously thought to be impossible.” – Robert Ringer
Listen, I’m a lucky man.
The people I know and surround myself with, from my best friends from high school to the most inspirational fitness experts in the world to amazing entrepreneurs from all around the world, are people that I’ve met because I’ve lived my life with purpose and clarity.
I will not settle for less. I will not live my life according to anyone else’s expectations. I get ridiculed, called names, and criticized a lot, but it’s not going to stop me from living the way that attracts the RIGHT people into my life.
The decision to do so has been the most important I’ve made in my life.
That’s why I’m surrounded by positive, high-energy people who are always trying to improve themselves, and who support me in my quest to be a better man.
There are my friends Isabel De Los Rios, a woman who has shown hundreds of thousands of peoples how to eat better (at last check her site has over 208,000 members and over 7744 questions answered on her forum). And she did it by not settling for less and through living by example without fear of what others thought of her.
Another one of my great friends is Bedros Keuilian, who has overcome being a poor immigrant from Armenia, who didn’t speak a lick of English in 1980, and who had to “dumpster dive” for expired food to help his family eat. He too lives by example.
Then there are all the men and women in my businesses, from my business partner Matt Smith who challenges me every day to defend my arguments (we have great debates) to my assistant Amy who helps me run the ship here at Turbulence Training.
All of them inspire me, and all were attracted into my life by my decision to live by example. Lead by living by example.
You may have people resist you at first, but they will come around. Many of my best friends from high school resisted healthy living, but many of them now live even healthier than me (but not by much, and we make a great friendly competition out of it).
Live and lead by example. Attract the right people into your life, both in the ‘real-world’ and on the Internet. Take full responsibility for your social network.
After all, you are responsible for your results in all areas of life. When you accept your results without casting blame and you learn from your mistakes so as to not make the same mistakes again, only then will you achieve what you want and have the right people in your life. That is how you must live and that is why you will succeed.
If what you are doing now is not working, then you must change. Don’t rely on doing “normal” things to get extraordinary results, because it doesn’t work that way. Normal and average behaviors only get you average results, and those just aren’t very good these days.
Many of the great people in my life have found me and my newsletters because I put my mission out there. I was proud of it, and I don’t care who disagrees with me. All that matters are the good people who are attracted to the mission of helping others.